98454

Joke of the Day

"I have never managed to find a happy medium All the one's I've ever met have a haunted look to them."

"What do you call a midget psychiatrist on the run from the law? A small medium at large."

"I changed my last name on Facebook to ""dis"", so I can start disliking the stupid stuff people post"

"If you have sex with a girl on Monday then your boy has sex with her on Tuesday, did he retweet her vagina?"

"What is a female peacock? A peacunt"

"Why don't gay guys go to lesbian bars? Because they can never find a place to sit."

"me: how was your camping trip 5 y/o: good me: what'd you guys do 5 y/o: camped"

"Guy told me I have ""Bambi eyes""...is that even a compliment? Oh god, please don't shoot my mother."

"What did the apple say to the pear? [Man, go] away!"

"I am a joke And my kid is the punch line"