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Joke of the Day

"Statistics say that there's at least one gay guy in a group of friends, I hope it's Tim ... He's really cute."

"My wife got angry when I said ""Samsung""... Apparently that was the wrong answer to: ""What oven should I buy to match my cooking style?"""

"What do they call a list of athletes in Jamaica? A rasta."

"Just realized that I'm finally too fat to do things during summer."

"Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay.. they'd be bagels!"

"Why did the skeleton cross the road? to get to the body shop : )"

"I have an archaeology exam tomorrow And it doesn't matter if I pass or fail because either way... My future's in ruins."

"You need a woman whose last name doesn't end in .jpg, .wmv, or .mpg"

"[I time travel and bring back Shakespeare] SHAKESPEARE: What's this? ME: That's a meme SHAKESPEARE: What the hell is wrong with you people"

"Me: goodnight moon Moon: It's 6pm Me: I know but I'm tired Moon: I literally just got here"