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Joke of the Day
"How Many Tourettes Sufferers Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb? Penis."
Next Joke
"You want the good Dorne plotline... ...but you get da bad pussay"
"I'm not the kind of guy to distance myself from anything... Far from it."
"I would help you carry some of those bushes... but I've already got two palms on my hands."
"Q: Why don't blondes eat bananas? A1: They can't find the zipper. A2: They cant find the pull tab."
"Alcohol doesn't get people drunk, people get people drunk. Drunk people get other drunk people extra drunk. People drunk people drunk people"
"Yo momma Is so fat, that she has her own event horizon!"
"Have you ever loved someone so much, you wanted to keep them hidden from the world and all to yourself? Well, apparently it's called kidnapping"
"My doctor told me to avoid trans fats. I'm really gonna miss Tumblr."
"[doctors exam] ""I'm feeling a lump here. Here's another. You have several lumps."" -uh oh, what does that mean doc? ""it means you're fat"""