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Joke of the Day
"I used to be a plumber on the International Space Station Shit was outta this world."
Next Joke
"getting sick of watching movies where johnny depp dresses like a hobo. I blame him for russel brand"
"A husband and a wife were at the table, having dinner. The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top. ""Och, I look like a pig!"" The man nods, ""And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!"""
"What do you call a female alligator? A galligator"
"yo mama so stupid she worked at an m&m factory and threw out all the W's."
"A lady said I was catching up to... her in terms of age. I said she must be moving too fast."
"To my English teachers who encouraged me to create magical works of literature as a boy. Here is my 3,007th Tweet. You can be proud."
"What do you call a cannibal that only eats Marxists? . . . a proletarian."
"I once bought an e. e. cummings poem collection.. It was the worst game of Mad Libs ever."
"Want to hear a joke about the ozone layer? [depleted]"