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Joke of the Day

"God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth. Then God made the earth round.....and he laughed and laughed and laughed."

"There's way too much blood in my alcohol system today"

"Why doesn't Ed have a girlfriend? Cause sheeran"

"Why did Kevin's Ice cream fall down? Because he was hit by a truck"

"Why are millionaires bad at swimming? Because they drown at their own wealth Edit: I got down voted :( I thought of that in my head and just wanted to share it"

"What do you call a squadron of baby soldiers? Infantry."

"[NSFW] Look on the bright side My hooker died during sex... Next hour is for free"

"Quickly after robbing my bakery, a man got a severe headache Serves him right. It's not his grain, it's migraine"

"""They like to buy t-shirts reminding each other of the words from movies they have seen and enjoyed"" - me finishing my report on humans"

"What do you call someone who studied from the greatest teachers in the country, met the greatest scientists, academicians, friends in the country? Donald Trump"