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Joke of the Day

"The difference between Sean Connery and a Silica Tetrahedron One's an ionic bond, the other's an iconic Bond."

"What's white and washes your socks? Your wife."

"What does Pikachu say when he puts too much salsa on his food? PIKA PIKA PIKA (Credit to my 5 year old son)"

"Why are all Atheists poor? Because Atheism is a not for-prophet organization."

"My favorite salad is a bunch of different kinds of Doritos mixed together"

"ME: someone stole my credit card number BANK: why would they spend $187 at a hot dog stand? ME: [hangs head in shame] that wasn't them"

"YO' MAMA IS SO FAT... GODZILLA Yo' Mama is so fat, she makes Godzilla look like an action figure."

"""Say hello to my little friend"" Great Movie Quote. Terrible bedroom talk."

"What kind of birds stick together? Vel-crows"

"It's funny how if you are a minority and commit a mass murder, you are either a terrorist, thug, or an illegal, but if you are white, then you have a mental disorder and misunderstood!"