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Joke of the Day

"16 zombie actors injured on movie set. Saddly no one noticed for 3 hours."

"What do you call an astronaut who loves himself? A NASAccist!"

"The last time I had sex, there was a dinosaur in the cave with us."

"My daughter got a sticker from her teacher that said 'resilient tortoise.' I've sent her in with one to give in return, 'patronizing hippo.'"

"How are spinach and anal sex alike? If you were forced to have it as a kid, you probably won't like it as an adult"

"Why did the bass player miss his second lesson? He had a gig that night."

"Knock Knock **Who's there?** You **You who?** Yoo hoo big summer blowout!"

"I never understood why it was popular in AOL chatrooms back in the day to ask if others had neurodegenerative diseases.... Squishyquake81: ""Hi, ASL"""

"The most stressful part of my day is when my 5 year old shows me what he made in Arts & Crafts and I have to guess what it is."

"*george washington shows up to the club to party* you got i.d.?' *george pulls out a quarter* you're in'"""