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Joke of the Day

"The guy who invented the crossword is buried in my town's cemetery... His grave is the 7th one down and the 3rd one across."

"What do the mafia and a women's pussy have in common? One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit."

"Obama says he's pro-vaccine, GOP comes out against it. Now Obama needs to express his support for breathing."

"What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph, because he is too short to be an essay!"

"What's the difference between a Kit Kat and an Essex girl? You can only get 4 fingers in a Kit Kat."

"FB lets you write your sex in now, so I have officially become a hat."

"My resume is really just a list of things I never want to do again."

"What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner? The placement of the dirt bag."

"Where do you store your wine? In the cabernet"

"You are all invited to my murder shed, I mean my shed"