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Joke of the Day
"Take my advice I'm not using it."
Next Joke
"Did you know when a man masturbates he generates 5 BTU of energy.. So if you had 5000 men in a room masturbating, it would be extremely gay."
"Dogs that belong to homeless people must think ""just say you're sorry dude and we can sleep inside tonight"""
"People wonder what my abusive father does after mom left us... Beats me.."
"What did the tailpipe say to the muffler? I'm exhausted. What did the muffler say back? ^mmmmbfmbm"
"[tv interview] I'm with Amy. Her house was damaged by the floods, how are you? [cut to Amy crying] MORE LIQUID IS THE LAST THING WE NEED AMY"
"My family tree is a cactus,,,,,, Yeah, we're mostly pricks."
"Financial Tip: When laundering money, always separate the bills from the coins and use the delicate cycle with a gentle detergent."
"I feel old whenever someone tells me they were born in the 90's."
"The Dentist says, ""When was the last time you flossed?"" The Patient replies, ""You should know, you were there!"" Heard this at the dentist this morning"