150466

Joke of the Day

"Went out for a drive today in my car & bumped into an old friend... Hope he doesn't sue me."

"The are only 3 kinds of people. The ones who can count. And the ones who can't."

"What do you get when a Catholic priest baptizes hay? You get a Christian Bale"

"Whats the difference between a porcupine and a police car. A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside."

"What did the sign on the door of the whorehouse say? We're closed beat it."

"My safe word is ""keep going."" It's led to some HILARIOUS miscommunications let me tell you!"

"My wife and I have lost 150 lbs combined!!! The search team are taking longer than expected to get her body back from the river though."

"Visitor: Wow you have a lot of flies buzzing round your horses and cows. Do you ever shoo them? Cowboy: No we just let them go barefoot."

"What hangs at a man's thigh, and wants to poke the hole it's often poked before? A key."

"Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calender? They each got 6 months."