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Joke of the Day

"[tv interview] I'm with Amy. Her house was damaged by the floods, how are you? [cut to Amy crying] MORE LIQUID IS THE LAST THING WE NEED AMY"

"Why are flowers the best test takers? They have all of the anthers."

"I'm 22 years old now and my eyesight is worsening,... ...at what point do I get adult supervision?"

"HEADLINE: A hole has appeared in the ladies changing rooms at the sports club. Police are looking into it."

"OK, guy with the two kayaks and two bikes strapped to his Subaru Outback: settle down. Save some outdoors for the rest of us."

"My best joke Cloid"

"ME: I can't find my sandals WIFE: did you look everywhere? ME: yes WIFE: even down ME: yes even dowI did not put those on"

"How do you make a moth bawl? Hit him with a fly swatter."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay 300 dollars to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"I like the NSA They're the only government agency that listens"