94047
Joke of the Day
"""shake what ya momma gave ya!"" *starts shaking low self-esteem*"
Next Joke
"New Years Eve forecast: Mostly drunk with a slight chance of passing out."
"Ya know who's probably more bummed out than any of us? Bums."
"When hipsters replaced hippies, we lost free love and drugs and got skinny jeans. Worst. Trade. Ever."
"A well executed theft leaving no fingerprints behind is... ... a stainless steal."
"You know how when you're in high school and you get ""senioritis"" and your brain shuts down? When does it come back on?"
"HR: Do you know why I called you in here today? Me: I have a boyfriend HR: Ok, sorry to bother you"
"How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just sit in the dark and cry."
"What's the worst thing about running 100 meters in less than 10 seconds? Being black."
"I could see my girlfriend was furious when I blew my load last night... I could see it in her eyes."