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Joke of the Day

"HR: Do you know why I called you in here today? Me: I have a boyfriend HR: Ok, sorry to bother you"

"""Why did you leave your last job?"" -I had a typo in a tweet. ""Mistakes happen!"" -I worked for Yahoo Finance. ""Thanks for coming in. Bye"""

"How come you never write e-mails? I'd rather send a note!"

"What did 9 say to 11? Let's get Bush in on this."

"I just hate when these girls take selfies on road specially when i am peeing in the background."

"What does a cop and a dj have in common They both tell drunk people to put their hands up"

"What's the worst thing to hear during sex? ""Honey, I'm home!"""

"What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? Dam."

"My new girlfriend wants to meet my dad But I do too."

"Do you guys ever get a shooting pain across your body like someone has a voodoo doll of you & they're stabbing it? No? How about now?"