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Joke of the Day

"If a small quiz is a quizicle then a small test is a testicle My science teacher told us this."

"Viagra now comes in a nasal spray. It's for dick heads."

"I hope you guys realize that sunflower seeds are salted little plant babies."

"If you're going to get in trouble for hitting someone, might aswell hit them hard."

"BABY: WAAAAAAA- ME: Shhhh, it's okay. BABY: -AAAAAAAA- ME: shhhh.... BABY: -AAAAAALUIGI! ME: wtf BABY: (whispering) No one will believe you."

"FRIEND: Try to relate to her. (Later on Date) ME: *nervously* Can I be your cousin?"

"Judge: *whispering* pls stop introducing yourself like this just because u work in my chambers it doesn't m- Me: YES HI IM HIS CHAMBERMAID"

"What does Bill Clinton say to Hillary after sex? I'll be home in 20 minutes."

"Girl in the locker room put her pants on the floor and tried to hop into them. I was going to call her awesomepants, but coma girl works too"

"What do you get if you cross a phone with a birthday celebration? A party line!"