158454

Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend treats me like I'm God She ignores my existence and doesn't ever speak to me."

"Did you hear about the butcher who backed into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work"

"Why are womens feet shorter than mens? So they can stand closer to the sink."

"I told my mom that bukkake is Japanese for bundt cake... I hope I'm there when she orders dessert at the steak house."

"Why can't bears get jobs in Australia? They don't have the right koalfications!"

"How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!"

"Why can't bicycles stand up on their own? Because they're two tired!"

"Two parrots were sitting on a perch One says to the other... Do you smell fish?"

"How are a 9-volt battery and a girl's asshole similar? Even though you know you shouldn't you lick it anyway."

"Two atoms are in a bar, Two atoms are in a bar. One says, ""I think I've lost an electron."" The other asks, ""Are you sure?"" To which the first replies, ""I'm positive."""