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Joke of the Day

"In college a dirty $20 bill tried to have sex with me. I didn't have a condom so I declined because you never want to get Financial AIDS."

"Why did the climate scientist cross the road? To analyze the chicken s carbon footprint."

"I think the professor wants us to skip most of this essay Or maybe I'm just jumping to a conclusion."

"What's the difference between anal sex and an oven? The oven doesn't fart when you take the meat out."

"What do you call a pig sneak attack? A Hambush."

"Alcohol doesn't make you fat... it makes you Lean... on tables, chairs & random ugly people...or sometimes floors"

"One time John Waters spilled water on me and my mom said ""thank god his name isn't John Barbecue Sauce!"""

"What's upside down and downside up at the same time ? A kid with cerebral palsy living in Australia"

"Why shouldn't you tell secrets when a clock is around? Because time will tell."

"Read this in an email by the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF) - science joke ""This newsletter is printed from 100% recycled electrons."""