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Joke of the Day

"Read this in an email by the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF) - science joke ""This newsletter is printed from 100% recycled electrons."""

"If a dog tells you you're dreaming... believe him."

"What's an asian's favorite drug? HERROine ^^^^^^I'm ^^^^^^sorry, ^^^^^^that ^^^^^^was ^^^^^^aweful."

"You know how the bud light campaign got through PR? Because the guys at bud light aren't used to getting consent and don't take no for an answer."

"A redhead tells her blonde stepsister... ...""I slept with a Brazilian...."" The blonde replies, ""Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"""

"Bernie Sanders The real reason Bernie Sanders went to the hospital because he looked at his poll numbers Berning up. Doctors have said that he must have felt the BERN."

"1. Dial random number. 2. Wait for answering machine. 3. Say ""My wife is out of town, I miss you"". 4. Hang up. 5. Happy Valentine's Day."

"What Do You Call a Bad Circumcision? What do you call a bad circumcision? A rip off."

"A horse walks into a bar The bartender asks ""why the long face?"" The horse unable to understand human speech promptly takes a dump on the floor and leaves"

"1st thing I do when I take a girl back to my bedroom is act like a stewardess & instruct her where exits are, oxygen masks, & life jackets."