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Joke of the Day

"What's upside down and downside up at the same time ? A kid with cerebral palsy living in Australia"

"When did you find out Santa wasn't real? For me it was when I noticed he had the same birthmark on his cock as my uncle."

"""And remember to talk to everyone like they're a 3rd grader."" - flight attendant manual"

"A cop pulls over a guy for suspected DUI ""How high are you?"" the cop says. ""No, officer, it's 'Hi, how are you,'"" says the guy."

"A time traveler walks into a bar... The bartender says ""we don't serve time travelers here."" The time traveler looks at the bartender and says ""it's about time!"""

"What do you call a fake noodle?... An Impasta!"

"[Nsfw] What's the difference between a dead baby and a cantaloupe? I don't fuck a cantaloupe before I eat it."

"One of my nipples is a different color from the other two. Is this normal?"

"Why couldn't they find the cheesemaker after the accident? He was trapped under da-Brie!"

"My music teacher got electrocuted yesterday Unfortunately he was a great conductor."