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Joke of the Day

"""When I learned how to edit videos I felt like the Flash..."" Friend: ""Why, because you fast learner?"" Me: ""No, because I fucked up the timeline."""

"What do you call a Romanian grocery clerk? Scanthesku"

"Peek-a-Boo! by I. C. Hugh"

"PESSIMIST: Dark tunnel. OPTIMIST: Light at the end of the tunnel. REALIST: A train. TRAIN OPERATOR: 3 idiots standing on the tracks."

"Non-technical people, here's a secret. We tech folks have no idea what the problem is. We just try to narrow it down, removing variables."

"What's the difference between a pot of glue, a tuna, and a guitar? You can tuna guitar but you can't guitar a tuna!"

"Mr Clause caught Mrs Clause cheating on him. What a ho ho ho."

"How many stoners does it take to, ah... unhhhh.........."

"What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market? 'Hi girls!'"

"I was recently asked how I view lesbian relationships. Apparently ""Through a window"" is not the correct answer! thanks user/TheLuckyBarkeep"