91724

Joke of the Day

"the reason we're moving is because it's haunted. we probably wouldn't mind a normal ghost but this guy died while quoting Borat was popular"

"If you visit the president of Russia..... ......be sure to Putin a good word for me."

"what if spiderman shot spaghetti out of his wrists instead of webbing and worked at the olive garden"

"I've been eating a lot of pineapple lately, you know what that means... I have a pineapple flavored sock under my bed."

"Did you hear? There was an active shooter at the observatory! He was shooting for the stars!"

"What does spinach and anal sex have in common? If they were forced on you as a child you probably don't like them as an adult."

"Multiple personality disorder has made my sex life hard... I want to masturbate , but I'm not into orgies."

"*man invents wheel* ""How can we possibly improve this?"" *Man invents wheel of cheese* ""Nailed it!"""

"I got a job at a circle making factory! Sadly, I was fired today because I was cutting corners"

"Airlines. Graciously giving you the choice to have feet, or a personal item, but not both."