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Joke of the Day
"I lost one of mom's Tupperware at work and now I'm looking for a new family to adopt me."
Next Joke
"Ken walks into a bar... ..bie doll."
"I just participated in a silent disco. Well, I got drunk at the morgue."
"Not now ex-boyfriend. Someone favorited 2 of my tweets. I'm a huge deal around there now & you lost your chance. Just kidding. What time?"
"A Bitter Army Veteran storms into a classroom and shouts ""If it weren't for me you'd all be speaking German!"" ""That's right"" replies the German teacher."
"TIL that a class was taught by the wrong stand in teacher and the students knowingly went along with it. Whoops, wrong sub."
"I remember when the History Channel actually played MUSIC!"
"How do dentists like their eggs? Poached."
"Do you have any naked pictures of your girlfriend on your phone??? No?? Want me to send some to you?"
"A man walks into a bar holding a piece of asphalt. The man says, ""A beer please, and one for the road!"""