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Joke of the Day
"A guy walks into a bar Ouch"
Next Joke
"What did the girl say when she saw a photo on Instagram of an attractive couple at brunch? Bae-goals"
"Do these jorts stuffed with free breadsticks from Olive Garden make my thighs look oily?"
"Because of the efforts of my great grandfather, we don't speak German in this country. That's because he single-handedly killed 11 language teachers."
"Why did the vampire use mouthwash? Because he had bat breath"
"Warning: password is case sensitive. password i think ur case is cute dont woorry so much"
"I'm writing a book about futurology. It's coming soon."
"They should make it slightly less easy to ruin everything."
"I feel like if there ever was a zombie apocalypse I'm so numb to them at this point I wouldn't even bat an eye."
"Me: Pack your bags.I won the lottery! G/F: Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff? Me: Doesn't matter, just get out."