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Joke of the Day

"I'm writing a book about futurology. It's coming soon."

"My fiancee asked me why I always back into parking spots... I told her ""guys typically want to just pull out"". She was not amused."

"What's the difference between rape and vehicular manslaughter? It's harder to eat a plate of ribs during a rape."

"I appreciate it when someone tells me to just ""get over it"" when I'm depressed. It gives me a chance to exercise my grave digging skills."

"You're so empty inside....nnn....stupid fridge."

"I often cry after sex. But in my defence, I use a pretty big onion."

"Did you guys hear Adele might have cancer? It's not confirmed, but tumor has it"

"What do you call a man who you are not sure will become your friend? A training brah."

"I have the solution to the drought in California Just let all the ladies hear my mixtape"

"Ate way too much..I'm gonna go to Africa and throw up everything I just ate for all the starving children..yes I do have a generous side."