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Joke of the Day
"My gf went to the beauty parlor and got a Brazilian. Nothing extreme, just punched her."
Next Joke
"When I got pregnant people would always say 'eating for two now are we?' I'd tell them to bugger off, I'm not cutting down."
"Any jokes about failed startups?"
"if God exists it's probably a woman no man holds a grudge for this long"
"Why did the golfer take a spare pair of trousers with him? Incase he got a hole in one!"
"Dirtiest joke ever told A pig rolled in the mud"
"My life is like a movie where two soulmates meet in line at the grocery store, except I'm the woman behind them buying tampons and cat food."
"*wife sees me crying* Her: What's going on? Me: The kids gave me this *holds up Dad Is #1 mug* W: That's sweet H: Sweet? They think I'm pee!"
"Did you hear they discovered a carnivorous tree in the Amazon? Don't worry its bark is worse than its bite."
"I almost had a three sum last night. I just needed two more people."