87517
Joke of the Day
"""It's okay, little buddy. Mommy cries when her bottle is empty, too."""
Next Joke
 
"What did Tom Riddle's calculator tell Harry Potter? 8008132"
"Alcoholism doesn't run in my family. It walks. You spill less beer that way."
"When my toddlers are teenagers I'm going to wake them up in the middle of the night to tell them I'm thirsty"
"What do you call a person who makes a clever point during a discussion at another's expense? A Douche"
"Why did the lobster blush? Because the see weed."
"religion? um, ha, no. i'm not really into the idea of letting a set of ancient rules dictate my life. plus, pisces aren't usually religious"
"I wanted to reserve a copy of a new novel coming out But they were all booked"
"What do you call an Asian getting mugged? Black and Yellow"
"I almost got my fingers stuck in my cheese grater. It's one of my greater fears."