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Joke of the Day

"Today I was asked, ""What is something you prefer from a sexual partner, but could go without?"" ""Consent"""

"Girlfriend: ""Does this dress make me look fat?"" Me: ""Stop blaming the dresses."

"My homework brings all the Asians to the yard, And they're like ""It wasn't that hard."""

"""Bros before hoes"" sounds like something a bro without a hoe would say."

"""Why can't a Christmas tree walk? ""Because it **doesn't have legs**."" ""Ugh, that's so **lame**."""

"To catch chlamydia, you have to think like chlamydia."

"Why can't your wife make crispy bacon? Because she got used to your soft meat."

"A pirate walks into the bar with a steering wheel in his pants... The bartender says ""hey, you know you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" the pirate responds ""ARGH! it drives me nuts!"""

"How do you scare a snowman? You get a hairdryer!"

"I like my slaves how I like my coffee. Free."