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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend nicknamed me after a piece of classical music She calls me Canon in D Major"
Next Joke
"""Does this leaf make me look fat?"" - Eve."
"Life is like a penis Soft and free flowing. It's the women that make it hard."
"Are you a carpenter? Because your fabricating stories!"
"Parenting tip: Unplug the microwave before dropping acid because you'll inevitably put the baby in there for safe keeping."
"I like my puns like I like my sausages... the wurst ones are the best."
"What do you call the Irish guy who always brings flan to the potluck? Shaun O'flanagan"
"I've come from the future to let you know the Chilean miners will be OK, and that we haven't yet perfected time travel."
"Q: How many Russian leaders does it take to change a light bulb? A: Nobody knows. Russian leaders don't last as long as light bulbs. A: None the old bulb is just suffering from a cold."
"My wife has an odd way of starting conversations. She always begin by saying ""Hey, are you even listening?"""