196849

Joke of the Day

"Dogs have a tendency to bark just to hear themselves bark. Reminds me of some people I know."

"My Echo ''You're beautiful and I love you,"" I yelled as I stood alone on the cliff, and my echo replied ""I just want to be friends."""

"I'm thinking about selling my Theremin. I haven't touched it in years."

"What is the difference between a girl from London and a Kitkat? You only get 4 fingers in a Kitkat."

"Don't let them fool you. Squirrels are just rats dressed in Armani."

"Why do scuba-divers fall backwards off the boat? ...Because if they fell forwards they'd fall back into the boat."

"Chicago launched an innovative new ride-sharing program today and the way it works is some guy stole my bike."

"I was staring at a fish. Suddenly, it started laughing ...It was probably because of my aqueous humor"

"I hit a Milestone today and now my fist really hurts."

"*crawls up from backseat* *slowly pulls off paper bag from head* What? No... I'm not embarrassed by your driving"