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Joke of the Day

"Only in Scotland, will you ever see a man take a piss on a door, then open it and walk inside. (credit: Frankie Boyle)"

"Who's the most forgettable Disney/Pixar character? Bing-Bong"

"I was walking in a cemetery this morning and I spotted a bloke hiding behind a gravestone. I said, ""Morning.""He replied, ""No, just having a shit."""

"Whats red, 10 inches long, and makes your girlfriend cry when you put it in her mouth? her miscarriage"

"What's the longest word in English? smiles. Because there's a mile between both S."

"I know the word diputserom sounds bad, but its more stupid backwards"

"""tell... my wife... i loved her..."" carl dies. NOO! U LOVED HER WHAT?! *shakes body* U LOVED HER... TITYS? HER CAT? *slaps face* PLS WAKE UP"

"Why are men like blenders? You need one, but you're not quite sure why."

"If you put your right ear really close to your left knee and you listen... ...you can hear a voice say 'What the fuck are you doing?'"

"An alcoholic walks into a candy store... then a table, then a chair, floor."