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Joke of the Day

"I hate it when all of North America tells me I exaggerate"

"I once met a man from Nantucket... ...He didn't understand limericks, either."

"I'm agnostic. What happens to me when I die? Idk. (I decay)"

"I got so drunk the other night that I lost my glasses. The rest is a blur."

"My friend really changed onced she decided to be a vegetarian It's like I've never known herbivore"

"Why did the hipster cross the road? To get to a place you've probably never heard of."

"I'd like to start today by telling you how wonderful (NAME) is. I'd like to but..."

"If your idea of a nightcap is passing out drunk on the toilet with a fifth in your hand, we could probably hang out."

"Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!"

"An English, an Irish and a Scottish went to a bar... I am waiting they to come back to finish the joke"