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Joke of the Day
"Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize. ba dum tish!"
Next Joke
"I painted a banner for our annual family picnic, but my Mom thought ""Celebrating 100 Years of Undiagnosed Mental Illness"" was inappropriate."
"[commercial] WOMAN: have u ever wondered what would happen if a car alarm could swim? NARRATOR: geese"
"What's long, hard, and has cum in it? ... a cuCUMber."
"LISA GOPMAN: EATING DISORDER For as long as I can remember, I've had an eating disorder: reverse anorexia. It's when I look in the mirror and think I'm really skinny."
"Offer: free guitar No strings attached"
"So I just listened to Kanye's album... Dafuq?"
"A person automatically becomes ten times more attractive when you find out they like you!!!"
"I like my coffee like I like my women Basically, I'm now banned from Starbucks."
"If Hillary becomes president... ...will that make Bill the first husband?"