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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a clown cry? Kill his entire family."

"What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well beer nuts are usually around a buck fifty, and deer nuts are always under a buck."

"I became a vegetarian yesterday. I regret it already, I guess you can say it was a missed steak."

"Dating tip: Don't do it, a disturbingly high percentage of people are actually flesh eating insects in human suits. Just stay home instead."

"I used to be into S&M. And necrophilia. And bestiality. Then I realized I was beating a dead horse."

"Why do they want to change the faces on dollars but not on coins? Because the only constant is change."

"Did you hear about the suicide bombing camp? I heard it was a blast."

"My doctor suggested I use ice to reduce the pain. But I think this whiskey tastes just fine without it."

"It turns out the town drunk is an exorcist. Since his last visit, there are no more spirits in the liquor store."

"Did you hear about the woman who doesn't like banker jokes? So if you take her on a date, you'd better not teller any."