8223

Joke of the Day

"Don't text and drive. Just pull over until you're done using your phone. That's what I do. I've been on the side of the road since 2011."

"""You are gonna hate yourself in the morning if you stay up late"" Jokes on you I am gonna hate myself in the morning no matter what."

"I just wanna give a shout out to the ancients, for inventing the calendar. It has made my day"

"Well, say what you will about Jerry Sandusky... At least we know he drives slowly through school zones."

"What do you call a time traveler who masturbated in the future? A blast from the past."

"So an elephant and a naked man are talking, you know how that goes... and the elephant says to the naked man. ""Its cute but can you really breathe through it?"""

"Roses are red, Violets are blue Gorilla shot at Cincinnati zoo"

"Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play? Because hot dogs are the wurst!"

"What did people start calling the medical school that allowed animals to study medicine? The hippocampus."

"Where did the judge go to buy a necklace for his wife? The jury store"