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Joke of the Day

"I was gonna make a joke about Alzheimers.. ..but I forgot what it was."

"I was once slapped in the face by a girl with twelve nipples... (.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.) Sounds weird, dozen tit?"

"*cop sees chalk outline on family's driveway* ""Damn, a cute bunny was murdered"" ""No, the kids who live here drew that, the body's over here"""

"How do blind people know when to stop wiping their ass?"

"Q: Did you hear about the girl who skipped rope while she read? A: She jumped to conclusions."

"What do you call a girl without arms and legs? A fuck nugget"

"May I have a quick word with you? Velocity"

"A popular post on reddit about a clothing store has to be a hot topic"

"Let's walk barefoot on grass! -People who have never walked a dog"

"My lesbian neighbors got me a Rolex for Christmas. I guess they didn't understand what I meant when I said ""I wanna watch""."