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Joke of the Day

"I overheard an extremely perverted frog at the pond yesterday. Kept saying ""rubbit"""

"""It's not you, it's me. And me. And me! And me. And me."" - schizophrenic break up"

"Why did Boba Fett work alone? Because he was hunting Solo."

"There's something about curling... ... that rubs me the wrong way."

"Gun control sounds like a dangerous but exciting way to change the channel"

"What do you do when a timeline dies? Barry it."

"What's a pirate's favorite programming language? You might think it's R, but his first love has always been the C."

"I love babies cause they just cry upon waking up and it's so honest"

"My doctor said the best thing I could do for my health was to go outside more. He told me to pick a fun outdoor hobby to motivate me to get out of the house. So I started smoking."

"""Hi, I'm writing a phone book, can I have your number?"""