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Joke of the Day

"So I went to a production about puns today... ...it was basically just a play, on words."

"How do you get an elephant out of a Safeway? You take the '*F*' out of '*Safe*', and the '*F*' out of '*way*'."

"I like my women the same way I like my coffee. Made by my mum."

"My kids are gonna be super disappointed when they find out sweet talk involves no exchange of tangible confectionary goods."

"Someone told me they were getting colored contacts, and I said ""aren't all their eyes just brown?"" that was a complete misunderstanding."

"I got attacked by a yob with bat down the local park yesterday.. I was really impressed with how well he had it trained"

"Police in Yorkshire have discovered a new method of taking Ecstasy, where users dab it into their mouths... E by gum"

"Monocles Why should you never go out drinking if you wear a monocle? Because then you'd be a barnacle."

"how do you catch a unique bunny? unique up on it. :) How do you catch a tame bunny? The TAME way!!! favorite cheesy joke."

"This salad isn't going to toss itself. *winks* - Things you shouldn't say as you pass food around the Thanksgiving table :("