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Joke of the Day

"I was arrested at a New Year's party last night I'm sorry, but when you hear an Arab counting down from 10 your fight or flight instincts kick in..."

"A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar.... Soon after a young boy walks in. The priest says ""lets fuck him!"" The rabbi says ""outta what!?"""

"Did you hear the one about Derrida? I'll tell you later."

"I think I'll design something cool, get a bunch of people to like it, and then make it steadily worse with every update. Oops, been done."

"What do you call a grain knife? barleysong"

"Poetry would be a lot harder if violets were orange."

"The TV's airing the same pressure cooker ad over and over again. It's Torr-turous."

"A lime and banana decided to become a stand-up comedy duo and called themselves ... Key and Peele."

"Don't tell me I don't know the difference between right & wrong. Wrong is the fun one."

"I did a girl missionary style I stole her cultural identity so I could take her land"