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Joke of the Day
"Why are gay guys always butthurt? Oh yeah."
Next Joke
"What will Donald Trump definitely do when he wins the election? Donald Trump will ban muslim, be a douchebag,make the whitehouse 500x larger and of course, BOMB NORTH KOREA!"
"I haven't been drinking. I know what day it is. I didn't lose my pants. This might be my car. I know how to drive. -Lies I've told to cops."
"Movie joke: Sling Blade ""Two fellers was peein' off a bridge. One said the water's cold. Other the the water's deep.... I think one of 'em was from Arkansas mhmm."""
"Yo mama's like a mosquito I gotta slap her to stop sucking"
"My paper boy is Jamaican... My paper is always late, and it's always rolled nice and tight"
"I have an eating disorder; I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets."
"My wife and I have started aggressively planning for our retirement, and by that I mean we're playing the lottery 3-5 times per week."
"I guess it goes without saying that I'm the Han Solo of Twitter, and you guys are Ewoks. Not even the Ewoks with names. Background Ewoks."
"What did Luke Skywalker say to his sister's bully? Don't you Leia finger on her"