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Joke of the Day

"I have an eating disorder; I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets."

"Man who farts in church... ... sits in own pew"

"We gave you Nickelback and Justin Bieber. You responded with the Kardashians and Honey Boo Boo. Well played America, well played"

"Two Congressmen are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, ""Pass the soap."" The second one says, ""No SOPA, radio!"""

"CNN is confirming that the only news in the world today is the blizzard. everything else is under control."

"How many Chicago Policemen does it take to crack an egg? None. It fell down the stairs."

"JOHN LENNON: Love is all you need ME: This guy knows what it's all about JOHN LENNON: I am the egg man coo coo ca chu ME: OK scratch that"

"I'm glad I learned about parallelograms instead of how to do taxes. It's really come in handy this parallelogram season"

"You wanna know how I hold my liquor? By the ears :p"

"What do you call a group of medical professionals who navigate around the Horn of Africa without being accosted by pirates? Doctors without boarders."