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Joke of the Day
"What was the weather like at the rap concert? There was a Lil Wayne."
Next Joke
"Your mother ."
"What kind of amphibian is hired to take your car away? Toad. Thanks, HammerElectionBeans for the edit."
"I've always been bad at studying for tests.. ...but recently I noticed I work a lot harder while listening to the 50 shades of Grey soundtrack"
"Know what a 6.9 is? Another good thing screwed over by a period"
"What do you call a bunch of Mexican stoners? Baked beans"
"Have you heard of OS X Def Leppard? It runs on ARM."
"mom: Why are your eyes red? Are you high!? [flashback to me cry-singing Taylor Swift's ""Love Story"" in the car on the way over] me: Yes"
"Young boy: Mommy, Mommy I can't stop spinning in circles! Mommy: Shut up, or I will nail your other foot to the floor too!"
"[Who Wants to be a Millionaire] Me: I'm stumped. Can I phone a friend? Host: What's your friend's name? Me: Wikipedia."