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Joke of the Day

"Know what a 6.9 is? Another good thing screwed over by a period"

"Watching a documentary is the leading cause of being unbearable in conversations for a week."

"Will you date me? breathe if yes, swim across the atlantic ocean while reciting the bible in japanese if no"

"I got a job crushing cans at the supermarket... It was Soda Pressing."

"Most women would be happy to be woken up on their birthday with breakfast in bed, flowers and 20 minutes of great oral sex! But Oh no! Not my sister!"

"Where do ants keep their armies? in their sleevies"

"I need a joke about lightning keep it pg thanks."

"If you're hitting the gas every time she tries to open the passenger side door, remember, the 8th time is always the funniest."

"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef. What do you call a cow with two legs? Your mom"

"Why is the Force like duct tape? It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together."