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Joke of the Day

"Quitting the gym because it's easier, quicker and cheaper to simply invite my friends over for dinner every day and make them fatter than me"

"Did you hear about the pub owner who raised a baby rabbit? It was an inn-grown hare!"

"What followed the dinosaur ? It's tail !"

"Before you judge someone... Walk a mile in their shoes. If you still don't like them, at least they're a mile away, and you have their shoes."

"My ex-wife is like Barbie... The bitch has everything."

"I feel like a lot of single women have been naming their cats Adele this year."

"How do you seize the means of production? By overthrowing the bourgeoisie "

"I'm ""whenever my mother calls, I think it's because someone's dead"" years old."

"Keep in mind that parenting guides are written by people with enough free time & financial resources to write a parenting guide."

"The best thing about a blowjob... ... is the 15 minutes of silence."