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Joke of the Day

"I've been squeezing the last drop of toothpaste from this tube for over a month now."

"Why did the priest go to the gym? For muscle mass. I thought of this one in the shower this morning."

"Two redditors walk into a bar, you won't believe what happens next! Seriously. I knew you'd click it."

"I like to think the automatic soap dispenser is just really happy to see me."

"Why is the computer so aggressive? It bytes"

"Ea vs Christiano Ronald Whats the difference bewteen Ea and Christiano Ronaldo. Ronaldo is Faster"

"Why did the libertarian cross the road? None of your goddamn business. Am I being detained?"

"My GF called me ""behind the times"" today. I got so upset, I paused the VCR, paged my friends & asked them to fax me their best advice."

"Back when I was a kid we stared at the wall when we took a shit and we liked it!"

"How does the rabbi make his tea? He-brews it"