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Joke of the Day

"I don't understand why people are so upset about Harambe I mean, gorillas get shot by white cops all the time."

"""I have something I'd like to get off my chest."" - Guy with three nipples"

"What kind of coffee do the Islamists hate the most ? French press"

"Doing United States puzzle with 7 when he tells me that ""Alabama should be called Mr. Sippi since it's next to Mrs. Sippi."""

"What do you call it when a jaeger licks your butthole? Pacific Rim Job."

"It's too tight Girl: It's too tight! Boy: Don't worry, I'll do it slowly Girl: Push it in! Boy: Ah, I can't... Girl: It's painful... Boy: Forget it. I'll just buy a new wedding ring"

"To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket: You can hide, but you can't run."

"Our topic today: Should we legalize monster trucks? We'll speak to monster truck expert Kevin, age 8. He believes they are ""cool and big."""

"Who died and made you king? Oh the king before you died. Well that makes sen- Oh he was your father. Well then I'm very sorry for your loss."

"What's it called when you throw Indian food at someone? Naan-aggression."