72908
Joke of the Day
"Why couldn't Edward leave Russia? Because he was Snowden."
Next Joke
"LPT: Laminate your index cards when studying. Not only does it prevent smearing, but the teardrops actually roll right off."
"[Brings a snowball to a work meeting and tosses it at boss] I'm not trying to disprove the theory of global warming I just don't like you."
"AMA Request: Innocent, uneducated rapist"
"It's such a lovely day, even the flowers are singing! Flowers: THE SINS OF OUR FOREFATHERS BIND US TO THE DIRT"
"I sure get a lot of compliments on my people skills for someone who flips off 10 people every day."
"I think I have hit rock bottom in my life. Do you know where I can buy some new tacks?"
"What do you call an STI in your nose? Sniff-illis"
"What do you call a fissure in the earth that houses old Russian rulers who like to mock others ironically? Tsar-Chasm"
"Did you know that a male ejaculates at 27mph? That's why I always get in trouble when I do it in school zones."