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Joke of the Day

"I bet if Leornardo DiCaprio has a kid... he names it Oscar so he can finally have one."

"What's the difference between Jesus and his portrait ? His portrait only need one nail"

"Told my mom ""The D"" stood for donuts, and now she won't stop telling people she wants the chocolate D."

"What do you call the mineral found in teeth and tooth enamel? Apatite."

"Jared gives a new meaning to ""Eat Fresh!"" How ""Fresh"" we talkin?"

"How do you catch a unique bird? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame bird? Tame way you caught the unique bird."

"I always say: ""Sex is a lot like pizza. How? Well, let me tell you about the worst pizza I ever had:"" ...it was fantastic."

"What do you call the exact opposite of progress Congress"

"How do you seat four gay men on a bar stool? Flip it over."

"Looked up from a text message and thought, ""Oh shit. I'm driving."""