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Joke of the Day

"Yes officer, I know my driving is not 100% perfect, but you have to agree that it is still pretty good for someone who is completely drunk."

"This documentary on tree frogs is absolutely ribbiting."

"I had a nightmare where Footloose was rebooted as many times as Spiderman."

"Growing up, my dad hated cigarettes so much, He would burn them every time he saw one."

"I know you seen me continuously push the ""close doors"" button while you ran to the elevator. Now it's just awkward"

"What do Hillary Clinton and the World Trade Center have in common? Both collapsed on 9/11 after becoming overheated."

"Me: *breathes* *gains weight*"

"The cast of 16 & pregnant are the future cast of 32 & grandparents"

"What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman - What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? - Snowballs."

"Why do feminists only drive cars with automatic transmissions? It pains them to have standards."