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Joke of the Day

"FREE $1,000,000,000 IDEA: a Tumblr-type platform for list-making called Schindlr"

"What do you call Nitrogen after the sunrises? Daytrogen."

"How much space does fungi need to grow? As mushroom as possible :)"

"You know why we can never trust atoms? Because they make up everything."

"No, I'm not concerned about crows infesting my house... It's actually just a mynah problem."

"The French are a very religious people... I talked to some of them, and they are all *Je suis* this, an *Je suis* that."

"As a girl: Tinder is like a refrigerator full of food but with nothing I want to eat."

"I found if you put the right stickers on your cooler and walk as fast as you can they'll let you in any part of the hospital you want."

"We decided to name our unborn child something that represents where it was conceived. Only 7 more months until baby Uber is born!"

"What did the male robot say to the female robot? 1100011010000010001000100101011101111100001011101001101000110011010110100000000110001001101011000001"