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Joke of the Day

"Whats a similarity between dogs and teenagers The girls are all bitches"

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"I stayed up all night waiting for the sun to rise then it dawned on me"
"What's the heaviest soup in Asia? Wonton soup!"
"A man walks into a zoo.. The only animal at the zoo is a dog. It's a shih tzu."
"What do you call an attractive bee who goes to bars? A bar-bee!"
"When hoes say, new year new me... they really mean new guys, new dick."
"(Computer science) I asked a Texan if he's seen his family tree, he said, ""you mean family graph?"""
"What do you call an important Australian? A significunt"
"Teacher: Why do you want to work in a bank Alan? Fred: 'Cuz there's money in it sir."
"Apparently impatient midgets don't like to stand on clocks... because it would make them short on time."