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Joke of the Day

"[god creating jellyfish] how bout an evil bag"

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"Two muffins are in an oven The first one says its kind of hot in here. The second one says HOLY SHIT it's a talking muffin."
"I got a new haircut about a week ago. It's starting to grow on me."
"The only thing better than iPad... ...is an iTampon."
"Steve Buscemi makes me regret buying a high definition tv."
"How many political idealists does it take to change a light bulb? None, political idealists can't change anything."
"Why is ink an unwise investment? Because it's a dyeing industry. - This is too obvious a joke to be original, but it came to me during my econ class, and so it's original to me!"
"How many crackheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one more."
"To the question What are you doing here?' 72% answered negative."
"Are you a pinky toe? Cause I'm gonna bang you on every piece of furniture in my house"